Problem

Supposedly, someone I look up to was affected by my dad saying "door" = "cross."

Problem

My dad keeps making sure I have a bad life.

Problem

They keep threatening and hurting me.

Problem

My dad said it's "up old" for me something bad he thinks I did, like stretching on after I'm up the hill or something.

Cut

I have a 2 inch cut on my neck.

Problem

When I was upset at the hotel I felt like bashing my head.  I can still feel someone I look up to like they're laughing that they did wrong to my head and neck and it looks different and I can't get rid of the feeling.  It's like they went and copied someone else who's mean to me.

Interference

My dad keeps reminding me he made me physically upset at the hotel during the hurricane and thinks he can just bother me all the time.

My Opinion

I think the large amount of inappropriate stimulation that the woman I look up to has gone thru has only made things worse.  Yes, I said it's like she's better now, but we did not need it and it was bad for me.  I assume it was not good for her.

Orlando

So many people here keep piping in information like they're here to tell all about it but are being mean.

Anger

Everyone thinks they have to rub in that the woman I look up to said to say all these mean things to me somehow.

Problem

I have suffered socially in fame for years.  All of a sudden, everyone blames me for Hillary Clinton not becoming President tho I supported her very much so and spoke positively of her.  People all over the US and maybe world decided to inappropriately stimulate a woman I look up to all the time since, been almost a year, hard to believe!  The woman I look up to thought it was important to care about me and my experience, but now it's like she's "better than me."

Qusetion

Why does Orlando smile so much?  Now, I'm in trouble with the people monitoring me in private and I regret it, but it was bound to happen already.  Can you catch anything else?  I don't want anything bad to happen.

Pizza

Something bad happened once at a pizza restaurant and now my dad is ruining my pizza intake and probably making me this cranky.

He is superstitious and thinks his mom said "anything related means you're in trouble because of that."  He said whatever comes out of her has to be legit, so he can look up to his mom.

My Plan

I'm not even going to church at all now.  It is too much energy to take the bus, too, and I keep buying soda when I go etc. and wasting my money.  The other reason is I wanted to focus on 1 thing, violin, and have fun for now going to Disney World once a week, to appreciate, enjoy, and relax.  I keep taking things away, like keeping up with The Ellen DeGeneres Show, tho she supposedly also has to talk to people involved monitoring me in private to strongly irritate me.  I don't go to violin lessons.  I just coach myself now.  I took lessons for over a year tho this past school year.

Another More Older Dude

I like and looked up to has been at me, too.  I gave my pastor convenient little gifts and religious letters a few times after mass.  I think I'm in trouble because he's attractive, and, tho other people did it I'm sure in private and talked to him at length at public events and otherwise, "not everyone" could do it.

Being Followed

A more older guy I like and looked up to has been following along just to inappropriately stimulate someone I look up to.  That probably ruined it for me, despite my efforts.

What do I do? Just hope...

Why am I so upset lately?  I just am fed up with being in trouble from the past all the time all day from my dad.  I know I masturbated, not too too much but still, into a period before this hurricane.  I dunno what the people who monitor me in private do, but my dad is still annoying me I know.

This Morning

Well, I got my beauty sleep, but I woke up in trouble because I thought I made my life better after being in trouble and it "didn't go" to them.  Because Ellen DeGeneres makes me think of this word telling me not to think of it, I thought of the word "k***" when upset this morning.  I was also being assertive, upset at the people monitoring me in private, too.  It's too bad, but I don't wanna take whatever this is from whoever it represents or did it.  I'm probably still mad.  😕

In Trouble

1st, they said I was in trouble from a long time ago, in a weird situation.  They acted funnily and ended up just keep on bothering me and I became physically upset, like rough and weird.

2nd, they got mad even more because of that because they were already as mad as they could be.

3rd, the next morning my dad was acting sexually ridiculous.  I moved around a little to tell him to stop and he wouldn't!  I was being ignored, yet again.  I kept doing those things.  Now, there's a quietude like something worse will happen for me.